I went the other week to a Firewalk run by the very charismatic and amazingly funny Lisa Clifford. When she invited me, I didn’t really dwell on the thought – it had been on my list for years to try, and the date fitted with my diary.
There were ten of us. We spent the first three hours talking about our aspirations, doing a visualization exercise and building positive self-will and determination through supportive visualisation. Then we went outside, in a very positive frame of mind, to the fire.
The heat was intense as Lisa and Sean, her Fire-Maker, raked the red hot wood pieces across the grass, patting them down and creating a beautiful live-coal glowing wide scarlet path for us to walk along.
And I suddenly thought – O.M.G. – what on earth am I doing?
The fear hit my abdomen like a physical punch. I suddenly felt sick. My mind started to form the words
“You must be joking” – I can’t do this – I’m scared”.
But my mouth was too dry to say them. So what to do?
In my subconscious mind I compared the imaginary pain (which of course there wasn’t because I was focused on my goal) of walking across the coals, with the utter abject humiliation of admitting cowardice in front of nine others, of not being able to take it off my bucket list and of not experiencing something that would be, in its own way, a life-changer for me. And I asked myself “what’s the worst thing that can happen, eh? You’ve spent three hours discussing what you truly believe in, what you want to achieve, your goal – do you believe in your goal? And the answer was – yes, absolutely, without doubt, and I CAN DO IT. Nothing is going to stop me!”
So I set off and walked across. And again, and again – we walked the coals eight times, chanting, singing, clapping, sometimes alone, sometimes hand in hand with others. We conquered that fire. And that fear.
It was a fabulous night. Thank you Lovely Lisa. And nothing has been quite the same since then.
What are you afraid of? When does the fear gremlin hit you in the abdomen? What does it feel like? How do you deal with the paralysis of fear?
It’s perfectly predictable to have fears – it shows we are lively, thinking normal people. As M. Scott Peck, the famous American psychiatrist said ““The absence of fear is not courage. The absence of fear is some kind of brain damage.”
So how do we overcome our fears?
Think back to a time when you were truly afraid, but something you badly wanted to do kept you going and you recognised and accepted the fear, moved towards it, walked through it, did the deed and felt much the better for it
Consider what you might expect to happen when you take the step you fear, visualise the actions in a sensible, calm way, looking for the positives in the outcome
Remember something that happened to you which was very seriously bad in your life and think about how you overcame that and moved forward a much wiser and more knowing person.
Ask yourself what’s the worst thing that can happen if I do this? If the world won’t end and no small children or animals will die as a result, why don’t I just get on with it?
Giving in is giving up; you will never know how worthy an action is until you take it.
Don’t let fear stop you from achieving what you want to achieve. If you have a BIG THING you want to conquer that’s been on the back burner forever because you might have been afraid to fail at it, give me a call on 07711 930738 or contact me here.
Email: firstname.lastname@example.org Web: www.yourlamplighter.com